Tuesday, April 4, 2017

Inbox of Laughter- A Short Story

This hasn't happened to me, although I have had some odd messages before! Hope y'all enjoy it!

"What have I gotten myself into...."
Caroline groaned as she looked at the number by the inbox. 74 messages. And they had all come within two hours of Caroline taking over for her friend who moderated a book discussion group online. Her friend had warned her that the messages could be overwhelming at times, especially with over 300 members in the group.
"I seriously should have reconsidered offering to help Hannah with this for the weekend..." Caroline muttered as she started opening messages. "I don't care if she is maid of honor at Rebekah's wedding!"
Pushing back the frustration, Caroline read the first message.
"Dear Moderator,
I'm hoping you'll agree and send permission for me to advertise-"
Deleted. Hannah had said specifically, no advertising. That was taken care of.
"Dear Moderator,
I have a question. I'm supposed to be studying for my test, and I was wondering if you could help me with a math problem- maybe you could give me the answer? See, I'm taking trigonometry-"
Nope. Caroline almost laughed. She wasn't good at math, and she certainly wasn't going to help when they should be studying instead of sending messages looking for the answer.
"Dear Mod,
I'm hurt by the way you seem to ignore all of my messages. I've asked you repeatedly why you won't respond, and you still haven't! Why won't you answer when I ask you why you won't answer?!"
Caroline cringed. That sounded like something Hannah needed to handle when she got back from the long weekend of her sister's wedding. Next message.
"Dear Moderator,
I've been wanting to ask your opinion on a matter. See, I have five guys from school all texting me at the same time, and I know all of them must like me a great deal, but which one do I choose if they all like me? I know I'm smart, pretty, and funny, and they don't have to tell me that. I just wish they'd tell me that they like me so I could choose one of them to like back!"
Caroline's nose wrinkled. What? How could anyone think so highly of themselves? She'd just leave that one for Hannah, she was pretty sure it could wait a few days to be answered.
"Dear Moderator,
I have a really funny story I want to share with you, and see if you think it should be posted in the group. If you don't think it should that's fine, but if you do, I'd like to make the other members smile a bit."
Hmm, this had potential. Caroline read on.
"I was walking through the grocery store the other day, when I heard the creepiest laughter behind me. I couldn't find where it was coming from, so I kept browsing the cereal. TEE-HEE-HEE-HEE. There it was again! I looked around, but nothing! No one! Not even a store worker was in sight! I was starting to get a little scared, but needed to finish my shopping. I reached up for a box of cereal and something touched my leg! I let out a yelp and jumped back- knocking several boxes of oatmeal off the shelves behind him. Something grabbed my ankle! In a panic, I threw myself to the ground, began shoving my shopping cart ahead and crawled down the aisle, sobbing and unable to call out for help. I reached the end of the aisle and looked back in time to see two kids- maybe five years old at the most- crawl out from behind boxed products on either side of the aisle. Now, I know this sounds like a scene straight from a horror movie, and I would have agreed it was, except a manager came tearing around the corner, stopped when he saw me and went pale. 'I'm so sorry! Those are my twins! It's bring your child to work day!' I looked up at him, almost in tears, and he stooped down to help me to my feet. 'You'll have to excuse them, their uncle is a writer for a prank show and they've just got back from spending a week with him.' The cause of my tears went from panicked horror to uncontrollable laughter. The manager took a moment before he joined in the laughter. I thanked him for giving my heart a good jolt for the day, and kept going with my shopping while he went to find his kids. Unfortunately, he must not have found them in time, because I heard a similar scream-cry-and-apology come from the baby care aisle not two minutes later.
I just thought I'd share that story with you and see if you thought it'd be okay to tell the rest of the group."
By now, Caroline was doubled over, her eyes watered to the point she could hardly see to read, and her chest hurting from laughing so hard. She answered quickly that it was fine to post, and moved to the next message.
"Hey Mod,
Yo, I gots a q for you. Wut's up with u? That's all. Smiles From Hannah- texting at the rehearsal dinner ;)"
Caroline grinned and prepared to copy and paste the last message for Hannah to laugh at. If it tickled her as much as it had Caroline, Hannah would be laughing for no explainable reason during the rehearsal.